Manners and communication go together like peanut butter and jelly, remove one, and things get sticky fast. Try communicating with bad manners and watch how quickly the message turns into confusion, irritation, or a full-blown emotional dumpster fire. Even if the words technically land, the experience sure doesn’t.
And in sales, experience matters.
The Overlooked Sales Superpower: Manners
Salespeople often obsess over scripts, objection handling, closing techniques, and CRM hack, but manners quietly outperform all of them.
Why?
Because manners begin with granting importance—to people, their viewpoints, their goals, their frustrations, and yes, even their long-winded stories about their cat, Mary.
(We’ve all met a Mary.)
When You “Know Everything,” You Learn Nothing
We’ve all encountered that person, the one convinced they hold the world record for being right. You could try to tell them the sky is blue and they’d correct you with Pantone color codes. They don’t ask questions. They don’t listen. They don’t even pretend to care.
And afterward you think, Wow… I would rather alphabetize soup cans than talk to that person again.
Now imagine that person is a salesperson.
That’s how prospects feel when someone rushes into a pitch without acknowledging them, their business, or their viewpoint. And later, the salesperson sits at their desk staring at their silent phone thinking:
“Why won’t they call me back?”
Well… because no one likes being treated like a speed bump on the road to a commission.
Lack of manners, meaning lack of interest, curiosity, and respect—is one of the biggest, most preventable causes of ghosting in sales.
The First Meeting: Where Manners Matter Most
Think about how you treat a guest in your home.
You don’t throw a PowerPoint presentation at them the second they walk in.
You don’t say, “Hi, welcome! Let me tell you why I’m amazing.”
You don’t hand them a contract before offering water.
(At least, we hope not.)
Instead, you:
- Welcome them warmly
- Ask about their life
- Offer hospitality
- Listen
- Make them feel comfortable
Why? Because you’re a decent human.
Sales should work the same way.
Before launching into features, pricing, graphs, guarantees, or your company origin story involving grit, destiny, and a garage, start with genuine interest.
Ask:
- “How are things going in your business right now?”
- “What made you start exploring solutions?”
- “What would a great outcome look like for you?”
And then actually listen, without rehearsing your next line in your head like you’re auditioning for Broadway.
And Now… The Smartphone Intervention
This one deserves its own chapter, and possibly a support group.
We all rely on our phones. They run our calendars, email, GPS, alarms, banking, shopping… and occasionally even phone calls. But in meetings, phones can turn the most polite person into a distracted raccoon drawn to shiny things.
We’ve all experienced it:
You’re talking, they’re nodding, and suddenly:
ding
Their eyes dart down like they’ve spotted buried treasure.
They’re not listening anymore. They’ve vanished into a text thread, Costco notification, or fantasy football update.
What message does that send?
“You are less important than whatever this is.”
In sales, that is fatal.
The fix is simple:
Turn. It. Off.
Your attention is the greatest gift you can give a prospect—and the cheapest.
The Professional Bottom Line
Manners are not old-fashioned. They aren’t optional. They aren’t “soft skills.”
They are revenue skills.
Because when prospects feel:
important
respected
listened to
understood
…they communicate more, trust more, and buy more.
Manners open doors that closing techniques alone never will.
So before your next meeting, try this:
- Show up curious
- Ask thoughtful questions
- Listen like it matters—because it does
- Give full attention
- Treat every prospect like a valued guest
Your sales results, and reputation, will reflect it.
